Top 4 Comments Gifted Teens & Adults Say About Their Childhood
Almost 2 years ago I began my journey creating Gifted With Goldens – both on social media and through my blog. My goal: advocate for gifted students and support parents/teachers. The most wonderful surprise that came out of it: connecting with other gifted students and adults and learning their perspectives of their childhood education.
On instagram, I have been shocked by the comments I have read from gifted teens and adults about their educational experiences being gifted. Surprisingly, most of them negative or have negative aspects. At first, reading these comments hurt me. It was hard to see so many people complain about gifted programs or education. But rather than being upset, I realized I COULD DO SOMETHING! How cool to have the power to take all of the negative messages and use it to inform current elementary educators.
So, from all of my informal data, I present you with the top 4 comments I have learned from gifted teens and adults about their childhood educational experiences.
1. I want to be seen for all I am.
The biggest trend I have noticed from the comments is that older gifted adults feel like they were only seen for their brain or academic abilities. They were not noticed for being athletic, musical, a passionate friend, or a curious explorer. This not only applies to other children, but their teachers as well. Every comment from a teacher was about their incredible academic ability, and it hurt!
What can we do as teachers/parents? Validate all aspects of a child outside of their giftedness. Certainly, children being gifted and their abilities are something to celebrate, but it is important to celebrate other parts as well. Did the child learn an awesome new trick in gymnastics? Celebrate it. Did the child work extra hard to help their classmates clean up? Celebrate it. Did the child go outside of their comfort zone and join the theater? Celebrate it. Lets work to celebrate the giftedness AND the whole child.
2. School is boring.
Between stories of not being challenged properly, given extra busy work, or being placed in the hall to do their “own thing”, the stories are horrific. All student deserve to learn and be challenged at school.
What can we do as teachers/parents? Create meaningful learning experiences that meet each child at their ability. I know this is much easier said than done, but it is imperative to plan for learning experiences that meet all students’ needs. Additionally, if gifted students finish early, they need to have something to work on that is meaningful and not busy work. Work WITH the child to plan this. Engaging the student in their learning and allowing for ownership opportunities develops a sense of investment in learning.
3. I never learned important life skills.
Perseverance, grit, time management, collaboration, and even asking for help are skills that children learn at a young age if challenged. If gifted students do not have opportunities to learn these skills, they struggle when they get older and are offered opportunities to take harder classes/activities. Making sure gifted students are challenged at a young age allow students to develop the skills necessary for this 21st century life.
What can we do as teachers/parents? Make sure you are creating meaningful challenging experiences for gifted children. Sometimes, this may mean going out of your way to make sure a child will fail and SUPPORTING them through the difficulties. I would argue that affective education is more important than academic education. Providing opportunities for a child to learn life skills can determine all they are able to accomplish later in life.
4. I was always expected to excel.
Repeat after me: Gifted kids aren’t expected to be perfect. Gifted kids aren’t expected to be models for other students. Gifted kids aren’t expected to teach other students. Gifted kids aren’t expected to never fail. Okay, a lot of double negatives there… but you get the point. Placing pressure on gifted students to be perfect creates many more issues (think: anxiety, depression, perfectionism)…
What can we do as teachers/parents? Celebrate failing! Nothing in life is worth doing perfect the first time – that means its too easy. Having affective conversations with gifted kids at a young age about perfectionism can make a big difference; particularly in their self talk, self awareness, and self perception.
Resources:
Below are some resources to support each of the 4 areas above. This is certainly not all that can be used, but it is a great place to start! Lets try to change the top 4 comments future gifted adults will be saying about their educational experiences.
“48 Famous Failures Who Will Inspire You To Achieve” Article
Mindful Kids Activity Books – These are some of my favorite activity books for parents/teachers to complete with kids and open up great affective conversations!
The Gifted Guide Virtual Activities – These are some of my favorite self-guided PBLs that can be used in the classroom in many ways, but an incredible way for gifted kids to find meaning in their learning
Gifted Summer Choice Boards – Can be used during the school year as well for meaningful learning when finished early or for self-exploration
